10 Random Poker Quotes

• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• Poker is a lot like sex. Everyone thinks they know what they are doing, but only a few are actually good at it.- "Dutch" Boyd
• Never educate a stupid poker player.
• If luck wasn't a factor, I'd win every one. -Phil Hellmuth
• "The poker player learns that sometimes both science and common sense are wrong; that the bumblebee can fly; that, perhaps, one should never trust an expert; that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of by those with an academic bent." -- David Mamet
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• Poker players and police officers have alot in common. Hours and hours of boredom with a few moments of sheer terror.
• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.
• "I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?" "Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones." -Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.