10 Random Poker Quotes

• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• Nobody would play the game if the best hand always won. -Will Schwarz
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• "Poker is just like the fucking universe man, the different combinations and outs are infinite so it's pointless racking your mind about bad beats and shit" Stephen Morris
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• "Never say 'Whoa' to a mud puddle" -- Anonymous $4-to-go NL A-5 Lowball Table, Cameo Club Palo Alto CA, 1977
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• Nobody knows where the hobo goes when it snows.