10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• If you can't quit the best hand, you can't play.
• Great poker players are separated from good poker players not by how they win their hands, but how they lose them.
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• To win a bit of money, make your opponent think your hand is stronger than it is. To win a lot of money, make him think your hand is weaker than it is. - Josh Avery
• In the game of life, women are the rake. - Worm
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."