10 Random Poker Quotes

• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.
• With all the new poker players I cant play holdem with a pair of gloves
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• "The poker player learns that sometimes both science and common sense are wrong; that the bumblebee can fly; that, perhaps, one should never trust an expert; that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of by those with an academic bent." -- David Mamet
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• Famous last words before he became a eunuch 'Id bet my bollocks on this hand'
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• you cannot have everything....where would you put it. (steven wright)
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• If it wasn't for luck, I'd win every hand.