10 Random Poker Quotes

• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• If you can't spot the sucker at the table, guess what..
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• ''when i bet i either have nuts or balls.''FRAN PINCHOT
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.