10 Random Poker Quotes
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More Random Quotes- I'd rather be good than lucky, I'd rather be lucky than lose...
- Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
- Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
- I'm too good for you, you might as well flip those 2 cards over.
- Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with.
Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
- "Hooks (pair of Jacks) are for Fish. You've got to flop 'em, fold 'em, or fornicate 'em."
Johnnie Moss
- Acey Deucy Never Leucy
--Phil Hellmuth
- Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
- Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
- "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]