10 Random Poker Quotes

• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• "I want him to think that I am pondering a call, but all I'm really thinkin about it Vegas and the fuckin' Mirage." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• What did the pocket 3's say to the pocket 2's? Your a dead duck.
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• Welcome to kicker school
• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders
• After taking a beat: "How bad do they play?...This is the World Series of Poker!" -Phil Hellmuth Jr.
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• You can't lead a horse to water, but a Donkey will follow you all the way to the River.