10 Random Poker Quotes

• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• "Why do you think the same five guys make it to the final table of the World Series of Poker EVERY YEAR? What, are they the luckiest guys in Las Vegas?" - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• With all the new poker players I cant play holdem with a pair of gloves
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim
• "I already messed this hand up pretty good, so I may as well call." Chris Ferguson
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com