10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• The worst hand to have is the second best hand.
• Poker - love the pain or play checkers. - MoeSyzslak
• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• I'm enough of a dreamer to realize it might have been that elusive something a gambler calls luck. But, I'm also enough of a realist to know that in general we make our own luck - through knowledge, skill and experience.- Doyle Brunson
• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05