10 Random Poker Quotes

• "I'm broke one day and have a fortune the next day, and I don't give a damn" --Jack "Treetop" Straus--
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• See AA before the flop is like a smile from the girl of your dreams, see AA lose to a pour hand on the river feels like the same chick just gave you a bad case of blue balls
• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• some call cheating immoral, but then again, it's immoral to let a sucker keep his money.
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!