10 Random Poker Quotes

• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• You can't lead a horse to water, but a Donkey will follow you all the way to the River.
• "I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?" "Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones." -Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"
• the perfect poker player deploys his masterful execution of logic and then litters it with chaotic sequences of lunacy.
• The all-in play works everytime but once.
• "The poker player learns that sometimes both science and common sense are wrong; that the bumblebee can fly; that, perhaps, one should never trust an expert; that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of by those with an academic bent." -- David Mamet
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)
• Trying to find the odds (not percentage) for this hand. One person has JJ the other 1010. On the flop is J 10 10, what are the odds of this happening?
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.
• "If you want to know what lies on the road ahead, ask the man whos on the way back" anon