10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• Normally, I wouldn't have called you, but you've been running bad!
• Take me to the river. Wash me in the water.
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• ''when i bet i either have nuts or balls.''FRAN PINCHOT
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• I should have stayed home and played with myself.