10 Random Poker Quotes

• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• never rub another mans rhubarb, unless he has the nuts - Jack Nicholson
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• " The commonest mistake in history is underestimating your opponent; happens at the poker table all the time."
• "I want him to think that I am pondering a call, but all I'm really thinkin about it Vegas and the fuckin' Mirage." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• Those eggs smell delicious!
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.