10 Random Poker Quotes

• Nobody knows where the hobo goes when it snows.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• Trying to find the odds (not percentage) for this hand. One person has JJ the other 1010. On the flop is J 10 10, what are the odds of this happening?
• People who play poker often wear raw hide.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• "The last time I saw this many Bad Hands was the Shoplifter's Convention in Vegas!" by flintsword
• "Percentage players die broke too, Burt." -Fast Eddie Felson "The Hustler"
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."