10 Random Poker Quotes

• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-
• Never educate a stupid poker player.
• Sex is like poker. It feels better to go all in. --Jarod Kintz
• "I could make a crazy call on you..." Sammy Farhah to Chris Moneymaker at the final table when Moneymaker went all in.
• Poker is for fat, American losers.
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• "The lucky player is usually the player that knows how much to leave to chance." flintsword
• What did the pocket 3's say to the pocket 2's? Your a dead duck.