10 Random Poker Quotes

• "The poker player learns that sometimes both science and common sense are wrong; that the bumblebee can fly; that, perhaps, one should never trust an expert; that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of by those with an academic bent." -- David Mamet
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• Liquor up front, poker in the rear
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• "Percentage players die broke too, Burt." -Fast Eddie Felson "The Hustler"
• This above all else: To thine own self be true. - William Shakespeare
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• "Hooks (pair of Jacks) are for Fish. You've got to flop 'em, fold 'em, or fornicate 'em." Johnnie Moss
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.