10 Random Poker Quotes

• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott, "Rounders"
• If you can't spot the sucker at the table, guess what..
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• The greatest feeling is when you've broken your opponent's spirit & crushed his confidence. The fact that you've taken both his bankroll & the shirt off his back is just a bonus. Tom V. (Livonia, Michigan)
• Liquor in the front, Poker in the rear.
• I don't want to be called a good loser. A good loser is still a loser. -Stu Unger
• "The last time I saw this many Bad Hands was the Shoplifter's Convention in Vegas!" by flintsword
• After taking a beat: "How bad do they play?...This is the World Series of Poker!" -Phil Hellmuth Jr.