10 Random Poker Quotes

• With all the new poker players I cant play holdem with a pair of gloves
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• ''when i bet i either have nuts or balls.''FRAN PINCHOT
• "Poker is just like the fucking universe man, the different combinations and outs are infinite so it's pointless racking your mind about bad beats and shit" Stephen Morris
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• I've noticed something funny ... the more I practice, the luckier I get. -- Jack Nicklaus
• "I want him to think that I am pondering a call, but all I'm really thinkin about it Vegas and the fuckin' Mirage." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson