10 Random Poker Quotes

• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• A pair of Aces with a low kicker is like a chick without nipples... -doyle brunson, circa 1986
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• Concentrate. Don't do anything stupid. Catch some cards. ----Mrs. Cloutier, as TJ heads out to another tournament
• There is less luck involved than a bad player thinks there is, and there more luck involved than a good player will admit there is
• Never educate a stupid poker player.
• "Poker is just like the fucking universe man, the different combinations and outs are infinite so it's pointless racking your mind about bad beats and shit" Stephen Morris
• "What's the sound of shuffling a single card?" - tidytom