10 Random Poker Quotes

• im going to 2 out you to death
• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.
• Poker is for fat, American losers.
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• "I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?" "Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones." -Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"
• Most of these quotes are abysmal and submitted by the sort of idiots who fill the partypoker chatbox with words like 'phuktard'
• "What's the sound of shuffling a single card?" - tidytom