10 Random Poker Quotes

• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• "Not all trappers wear 'coon-skin hats."
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.
• The best feeling in the world if flopping the nut straight against two players acting before you who both flopped sets. I'll take my chances against 5 outs.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• in the poker game of life women are the rake
• I used to go out, go dancing, and talk to the chicks. Now, my life has been down-sized to the couch, the laptop, and the occasional cranberry and rum. --The 5 card stud---