10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• I'm too good for you, you might as well flip those 2 cards over.
• I used to go out, go dancing, and talk to the chicks. Now, my life has been down-sized to the couch, the laptop, and the occasional cranberry and rum. --The 5 card stud---
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• "It's hard work. Gambling. Playing poker. Don't let anyone tell you different. Think about what it's like sitting at a poker table with people whose only goal is to cut your throat, take your money, and leave you out back talking to yourself about what went wrong inside. That probably sounds harsh. But that's the way it is at the poker table. If you don't believe me, then you're the lamb that's going off to the slaughter." --Stu Unger, three-time WSOP Champion
• If there was no luck involved I'd win every time. - Phil Hellmuth
• Welcome to kicker school