10 Random Poker Quotes

• Sign hanging in old time saloon: Liquor in the front, poker in the rear. -The old sage.
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• Nobody would play the game if the best hand always won. -Will Schwarz
• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• "In low limit hold em' deception plays a less significant role. Either someone is already looking at that hand or will call out of curiousity." ---Lee Jones
• Remember these three simple words and you'll never go broke........ "Stick em Up!"
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."