10 Random Poker Quotes

• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• To win a bit of money, make your opponent think your hand is stronger than it is. To win a lot of money, make him think your hand is weaker than it is. - Josh Avery
• it is true that you may fool all of the people some of the time: you can even fool some of the people all the time: but you can't fool al of the peole all the time. -Abraham Lincoln
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.
• The only way to win is to play. Unfortunetly, it is also the only way to loose.