10 Random Poker Quotes

• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• I guess if luck wasn't involved, i'd win every tournament -Phil Helmuth
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• I suck, therefore I suck out. North Shore Mike
• Nobody would play the game if the best hand always won. -Will Schwarz
• Sucking out won't help you. The only cure for stupidity is losing. -- The BRICK --