10 Random Poker Quotes

• See AA before the flop is like a smile from the girl of your dreams, see AA lose to a pour hand on the river feels like the same chick just gave you a bad case of blue balls
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• I'm a better poker player than I am a player. -RedGrant
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• What did the pocket 3's say to the pocket 2's? Your a dead duck.
• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
• If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.
• The best feeling in the world if flopping the nut straight against two players acting before you who both flopped sets. I'll take my chances against 5 outs.
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow