10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "Hooks (pair of Jacks) are for Fish. You've got to flop 'em, fold 'em, or fornicate 'em." Johnnie Moss
• The best feeling in the world if flopping the nut straight against two players acting before you who both flopped sets. I'll take my chances against 5 outs.
• Don't look at when a player sucks out on you with a trash hand as a loss. Think of it as an investment that will be returned with interest.
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• Don't challenge strong players, challange weak ones. That's what they're there for. - John Vorhaus, author of Killer Poker
• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• they call it poker because the word "FUCK" was taken.