10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester
• When you win... Rub it in!!! When you lose.. Drink the booze!!!!! Los Altos Dirt Bikers
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• Nobody knows where the hobo goes when it snows.
• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
• You have to piss with the dick you have
• Take me to the river. Wash me in the water.
• Life is a gamble at terrible odds if it was a bet you would never take it