10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• I'm just looking for a way to get outa here.... --------Doyle Brunson, goes all-in WSOP2003
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• In the game of life, women are the rake. - Worm
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• "The last time I saw this many Bad Hands was the Shoplifter's Convention in Vegas!" by flintsword
• I used to go out, go dancing, and talk to the chicks. Now, my life has been down-sized to the couch, the laptop, and the occasional cranberry and rum. --The 5 card stud---
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.