10 Random Poker Quotes

• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.
• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
• Where's the buffet? -Doyle Brunson
• Darwin takes a toll on the worst poker players because they lose money, Darwin takes a toll on average poker players because they don't make money and they will never be a great poker players, Darwin takes the greatest toll though, on the greatest poker players, because they could be doing something greater.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• You have to piss with the dick you have
• Poker is like a horse, five letters, two vowels
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.