10 Random Poker Quotes

• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• For all you probability freaks, remember to consider the probability that an opponent is lying. Generally, liars dig holes and keep on lying, at least in the short run, as they try to climb out. Adjust your math prowess accordingly. Tells are paramount, as much or more as your calculating brain is. Poker becomes super-multi-variable when the psychological realm is joined with that already beautiful world of card probabilities. -- a mathematician
• Fish don't eat Nutz!
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• Remember these three simple words and you'll never go broke........ "Stick em Up!"
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• If you play 69, always bet on the come.
• Kiddie games down the street! -- mike matusow
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!