10 Random Poker Quotes

• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• The best thing about that hand was I wasn't in it
• Fish don't eat Nutz!
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• I suck, therefore I suck out. North Shore Mike
• See AA before the flop is like a smile from the girl of your dreams, see AA lose to a pour hand on the river feels like the same chick just gave you a bad case of blue balls
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• "Poker is 100% skill, 50% luck" - Phil Hellmuth