10 Random Poker Quotes

• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• This above all else: To thine own self be true. - William Shakespeare
• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• With all the new poker players I cant play holdem with a pair of gloves
• Most of these quotes are abysmal and submitted by the sort of idiots who fill the partypoker chatbox with words like 'phuktard'
• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Take me to the river. Wash me in the water.
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)