10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• The only thing you lose by folding is the opportunity to win.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Poker players and police officers have alot in common. Hours and hours of boredom with a few moments of sheer terror.
• For all you probability freaks, remember to consider the probability that an opponent is lying. Generally, liars dig holes and keep on lying, at least in the short run, as they try to climb out. Adjust your math prowess accordingly. Tells are paramount, as much or more as your calculating brain is. Poker becomes super-multi-variable when the psychological realm is joined with that already beautiful world of card probabilities. -- a mathematician
• Sex is like poker. It feels better to go all in. --Jarod Kintz
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• Sucking out won't help you. The only cure for stupidity is losing. -- The BRICK --
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.