10 Random Poker Quotes

• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• "Why do you think the same five guys make it to the final table of the World Series of Poker EVERY YEAR? What, are they the luckiest guys in Las Vegas?" - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• Sometimes nothing's a pretty cool hand -paul newman-
• Take me to the river. Wash me in the water.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.