10 Random Poker Quotes

• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• I'm just looking for a way to get outa here.... --------Doyle Brunson, goes all-in WSOP2003
• The only way to win is to play. Unfortunetly, it is also the only way to loose.
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• The next best thing to playing poker and winning, is playing poker and losing.
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• Normally, I wouldn't have called you, but you've been running bad!
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.