10 Random Poker Quotes

• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• Poker - love the pain or play checkers. - MoeSyzslak
• If you can't quit the best hand, you can't play.
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• "Why do you think the same five guys make it to the final table of the World Series of Poker EVERY YEAR? What, are they the luckiest guys in Las Vegas?" - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.