10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.
• "If you want to know what lies on the road ahead, ask the man whos on the way back" anon
• No Limit Hold'em - Hours of boredom followed by moments of sheer terror.
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."