10 Random Poker Quotes

• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• "Why do you think the same five guys make it to the final table of the World Series of Poker EVERY YEAR? What, are they the luckiest guys in Las Vegas?" - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• "Poker is just like the fucking universe man, the different combinations and outs are infinite so it's pointless racking your mind about bad beats and shit" Stephen Morris
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• Great poker players are separated from good poker players not by how they win their hands, but how they lose them.
• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.