10 Random Poker Quotes

• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• Welcome to kicker school
• this hand sucked me in like an eagle in a jet engine
• Where's the buffet? -Doyle Brunson
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim
• Nobody would play the game if the best hand always won. -Will Schwarz
• "I raise, therefore I am." - Howard Lederer