10 Random Poker Quotes

• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• The next best thing to playing poker and winning, is playing poker and losing.
• Sex is like poker. It feels better to go all in. --Jarod Kintz
• If luck wasn't a factor, I'd win every one. -Phil Hellmuth
• Some days you're the pigeon, some days you're the statue.
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"