10 Random Poker Quotes

• I'm too good for you, you might as well flip those 2 cards over.
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• A pair of Aces with a low kicker is like a chick without nipples... -doyle brunson, circa 1986
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• The best thing about that hand was I wasn't in it
• "The lucky player is usually the player that knows how much to leave to chance." flintsword
• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• "I better straighten out my game, before I flush all my money down the toilet" - D. Drury
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.