10 Random Poker Quotes

• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.
• "The last time I saw this many Bad Hands was the Shoplifter's Convention in Vegas!" by flintsword
• The next best thing to playing and winning is playing and losing. --Nick the Greek
• The only thing you lose by folding is the opportunity to win.
• "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.