10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• I used to go out, go dancing, and talk to the chicks. Now, my life has been down-sized to the couch, the laptop, and the occasional cranberry and rum. --The 5 card stud---
• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• The greatest feeling is when you've broken your opponent's spirit & crushed his confidence. The fact that you've taken both his bankroll & the shirt off his back is just a bonus. Tom V. (Livonia, Michigan)
• "You will show your poker greatness by the hands you fold, not the hands you play." -Dan Reed
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• when i folded an A-7 suited under the gun which would've ended up giving me the small end of a mini jackpot, my dad said, "yeah, if i would've driven to Tucson, I would've found that diamond ring. But i don't drive to Tucson."
• im going to 2 out you to death
• Poker is like a horse, five letters, two vowels
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.