10 Random Poker Quotes

• You should pay as much as possible for a free card.
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.
• the perfect poker player deploys his masterful execution of logic and then litters it with chaotic sequences of lunacy.
• you cannot have everything....where would you put it. (steven wright)
• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.
• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• "I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?" "Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones." -Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"