10 Random Poker Quotes

• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• "I better straighten out my game, before I flush all my money down the toilet" - D. Drury
• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders
• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)