10 Random Poker Quotes

• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.
• If you play 69, always bet on the come.
• People who play poker often wear raw hide.
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• "You will show your poker greatness by the hands you fold, not the hands you play." -Dan Reed
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus