10 Random Poker Quotes

• Trying to find the odds (not percentage) for this hand. One person has JJ the other 1010. On the flop is J 10 10, what are the odds of this happening?
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• Don't challenge strong players, challange weak ones. That's what they're there for. - John Vorhaus, author of Killer Poker
• "I better straighten out my game, before I flush all my money down the toilet" - D. Drury
• "Poker is just like the fucking universe man, the different combinations and outs are infinite so it's pointless racking your mind about bad beats and shit" Stephen Morris
• You can't lead a horse to water, but a Donkey will follow you all the way to the River.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• There is less luck involved than a bad player thinks there is, and there more luck involved than a good player will admit there is