10 Random Poker Quotes

• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)
• Kiddie games down the street! -- mike matusow
• Someone on here said that "poker is for fat American losers". That sounds a lot like the ramblings of a foriegn homosexual who's busy scratching a broke ass.
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• If you play 69, always bet on the come.
• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from