10 Random Poker Quotes

• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• Sign hanging in old time saloon: Liquor in the front, poker in the rear. -The old sage.
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• "Not all trappers wear 'coon-skin hats."
• If you raise with 72 offsuit, you get to raise when the flops is 7-7-2, ... once in your life. If you fold 72 offsuit, you get the free time to study your opponents or the waitresses and avoid polishing the rail with your sweater ... tough decision!
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from